Well we have a had a long emotionally draining month, However I learned a few things.....
       
        Life is short, I know this and for the most part we really try to have special moments as a family and tell each other alot that we love each other and to appreciate what  we have.
 Josh's Nana really started downhill in August she was given 2-4 months and made it 10 weeks, we lost our awesome cat we had for 6 years and a week after returning home Josh's Mom had a head on collision .  What I am learning from this tiring month is......

I am allowed to let a ball drop.. This is something I have to allow myself to get over

As you may or may not know I work part time, but I am also  president of the PTA on top of my  normal mom chores. I have a hard time saying no and I also have a hard time asking for help, the flip side is that I am pretty laid back and try not to stress , I try to be involved in my children and their future. With that said I am human and I don't have to try so hard, I can let the house or dishes go, I am allowed to forget things. Its OK for me to stay in my PJ's sometimes. I  am only as good as the care I take for myself allows me to be . My kids are not going to remember the time mom didn't do the dishes or that  mom forgot she had a meeting that one day. They are going to remember that in the short time we all lived in one house we spent quality time together, they will remember that trip we took or place we went. They wont know mom forgot she had a meeting that one day

I am thankful and happy everyday for the many blessings we have, we say I love you every time one of us leaves , we don't go to bed mad and we try to do things together on a regular basis. This is what I hope they remember

The lessons of time apart

As you may or may not know Josh Has been out of state for almost 12 weeks for work.. We have had a one week visit in that time... What I have gained from this is not what I expected
   
The kids...this is not the hardest part of being alone, 3 kids that I have been a stay at home mom to most of their lives is the same routine regardless of who else is home. Get up, go to school, come home ,eat dinner its groundhog day for the most part.....being the only disciplinarian just stinks

The house...not to bad, kids can clean and do dishes..no one else to cook downside

ME... I have a really good time with my husband we laugh A LOT, we talk A LOT  we  went 2 years without cable, him being gone the dish was back within 2 weeks. I am bored and lonely. We have never spent more than a few weeks apart in our 14 years,  so this was a challenge

What I have learned, that dropping him off and watching him go through security and into the terminal is hard it makes my cry and is a sad day, however waiting for him to come down that escalator into pick up is exciting and makes my heart race in anticipation.  No matter if we disagree or argue, at the end of the day he is still the person I want to read the paper and drink coffee with on a Sunday morning.

I have also come to APPRECIATE even more the AMAZING support system that I have here in California. I may not have blood family right here but I have a family of wonderful friends who truly care for us and have helped with anything I have needed. These women are TRUE friends they listen when I need someone to talk to , they help with pick up or drop off or anything else I might need. I am so Thankful for you all and Especially my wifey, who knew I would come to California to find a best friend from BOSTON!!!!

the great swimsuit debate 2012

With boys you buy trunks and move on maybe throw on a rash guard, not with girls ugh!! Thalia has worn a 1 piece swimsuit since the begining. I see all the babies with there little chubbies in bikinis however we just never did that. I think its a choice that for us was not intentional but became that way. Thalia the last few summers as she spends more time with friends has been buggin to get a bikini. although super cute, I just felt she had plenty of years ahead and that she could wait. We agreed to meet in the middle a tankini it is

A promise to my children

      I have 3 very different and individual children which is how life is supposed to be. All 3 will continue to be amazing people as they grow. I do not promise much in life, but I do promise you this. To love you as you unconditionally. I will support who you are and the choices you make. I may not agree or think its best for you but, I will love and support you. I promise to treat you all equally you are all 3 the most important accomplishment I have ever made. I am more proud of you than you can even imagine. All I ask of you in return is to follow YOUR dreams. Not my dreams for you, but the dreams you have and what makes you happy!!! Find your happiness whatever that may be, find what makes you feel like the best version of you. No matter where that takes you , who you encounter or what it entails FIND YOU HAPPINESS!!!!!! I love you all I cant imagine life with out and all that you have brought me. As you move on and leave your Dad and I , I promise to be your biggest cheerleader I am always here for you thick and thin, right or wrong. I promise to never make you feel anything than loved.

Grieving

Grieving is probably one of the most personal processes in life.  We all have our own way men, women and even our own family members have their own way. So whats proper as an outsider do you give a hug send a flower or just say I am here???

The drop off pick up chaos

I don't know if every school has this issue or just our little town
   I drop my youngest 2 off early to avoid the line that makes its way down the hill as it gets closer to school starting. It tends to run smooth every other car goes in one coming up the hill one coming down pretty simple the hiccup is the parent or Grandparent who puts the car in PARK!!! That is a no no Johnny doesn't need you to get out give hugs and kisses, while we all what for you to move forward and clear out. Park in a spot if this is what YOU need to let them go to school Its March The child is fine.
Our middle school has MAJOR problems, 1st off there is the front to drop off or upper campus with an empty parking lot.. the mornings are smooth except for the mothers in the tanks that think they don't need to sit in the line and cut...Now would you cut in line at the grocery store or Disneyland probably not , but for some reason this person and their cargo are more important than you or the time you have spent in line.
The afternoon pick up is chaos and dangerous. Myself and my woman park backed into our spots and wait for our children and then file out like adults in line every once in a while you get the parent that would rather make a child crossing a speed bump than let someone into line....Its the same ones all the time so you just avoid them.. the chaos is on the street where a 3 lane road becomes a parking lot with children weaving in and out of cars to dash to the illegally stopped parent while others are U turning or driving in front of cars that have the right of way.... At what point did parents decide that the rules dont apply Its like a scene from Mr Mom "YOUR DOING IT WRONG"
and how many auto dial calls do we have to recieve telling us the proper way to pick up????This isn't rocket science

Iris Apfel

I adore this 90 year old woman not only does alot of her jewelry remind of the pieces I got from my grandmother But every picture of her she is amazing a no apologies style of her own I LOVE THAT. I can only hope by the time I am that age I can still get it up enough to put myself together in such an amazing way BRAVO!!!!!